a goodbye of sorts.

i've been thinking lately about what i want this blog to be.  i've debated before about what to do with this blog and my motivations for keeping it have always been that i like having something to document our lives with.  however what i don't like about blogging is the fact that i feel like i have to censor what i post since it's available for all the world to read.  

i've decided to go ahead and make this a private blog for myself and friends and family.

this way i can still use it to document our lives and for people who live far away from us current with what's going on in our lives.

there's not really a whole point in keeping this public since i really suck at being a part of the blogging community.  and with the arrival of avery i don't see myself spending a lot of time on the computer unless i'm working.  

so, if you would like to continue to read send me an email or leave me a comment and i'll send you the password once i make it private (after jan 1st).  

and to everyone else, goodbye and thanks for reading!

She's here!

meet avery nicole.  

she arrived december 20th and it wasn't a huge surprise to find out that our surprise baby was a she (charlie's hunch all along).  

getting her here was quite the experience and we're both so happy that she's a healthy baby.

we've been spending our time getting to know her, celebrating the holidays, and introducing her to family.

i really do love this dog.

even when he sleeps on the couch.

although i love him more when he sleeps on the floor.

happy friday.

as of today i'm on maternity leave.  except i have no baby.  my boss has told me that i'm welcome to come into work next week, and while i'm sure most people think i'm crazy for considering it, i just might work a few more days.work has been a very welcome distraction these past few weeks when it seems that all i can think about and all people want to talk about is when this baby is going to come.  the thing is, i don't know when that's going to be and i've been very happy to have some place to go that keeps me busy all day long and doesn't give me time to think about the fact that we still have no baby.  the thing is, this baby is still less than two weeks overdue.  i think it just seems so much longer because ever since i hit 37 weeks people have been saying "any day now".  and when you're thinking it's going to be any day, a month can go by pretty slowly.  the good news is that the baby's fine, i'm fine, and if it were up to me i'd be happy to let it take it's time.  however i don't think my doctor is going to let it take too much more time.  

as a result of this baby being late, we've had a few people cancel or postpone trips to come and visit.

while on one hand it's a relief not to have to entertain visitors who were expecting a baby, it also makes me sad that we're not going to see some people.  i was really looking forward to spending time with family.  i'm definitely going to miss our usual christmas visit with my family.  while i knew it would be different this year with a new baby, i was still looking forward to seeing everyone.  now, we're going to have a really new baby and will definitely be missing our usual celebrations.

i've had several people tell me not to let the baby be born too close to christmas, as if i have any control over when this baby is going to come.  i also like the thought that i'm somehow ruining this baby's future birthdays by "letting" it be born so late.  yes i'm sure it sort of sucks to have a combo birthday/christmas celebration, but maybe it will just make this time of year that much more exciting.  charlie's birthday is the 17th and he seems to have survived just fine.  

meanwhile, these things are making me pretty happy right now.

a sleeping cat.

a christmas tree.


donuts.  i've been wanting a donut for 9 months and finally caved. 

things i couldn't have survived pregnancy without

since i'm still pregnant i figured i'd make good use of my time and make a list of the things that were super helpful to me during the last few months.

... apples
... yogurt.  specifically this yogurt.  yes, i eat kid yogurt.
...  mamma bee belly butter.
...  naps.
...  old navy tank tops and shirts.  super cheap and super comfy.
...  peppermint tea.
...  walks with the dogs.
...  an awesome yoga tape.  this one is free on netflix streaming and helped a lot with sciatica.
...  ice cream.
...  peanut butter.  it is sad how much of this i eat.
...  honey.  my breakfast every day is yogurt and a peanut butter and honey sandwich.
...  decaf coffee.  just as good as the real deal.
...  water.
...  american eagle jeans.  i'm still wearing these at 41 weeks. and i'm sure i'll be wearing them afterwards, too.
...  also these jeans and these, although i didn't wear either of them until the last month.
...  my rainbows in the summer.
...  toms in the fall.
...  minnetonkas in the winter.
...  hot chocolate.
...  this website and this one for weekly updates.  totally made my every wednesday.
... charlie.  he's assembled furniture, hung curtains and pictures, taken late night walks with me, made numerous trips to babies 'r us (more than i have), washed clothes and baby stuff, moved lots of furniture, done the majority of the cleaning, and he's also pretty excited to meet this baby.


and now i'm so over being pregnant.  although i'm thinking this baby is going to end up being more of a christmas baby than a thanksgiving baby.  or maybe it's really just holding out for charlie's birthday.  at this point i'd take a double birthday in this house because it would mean it coming sooner rather than later.  either way we're looking at a baby before christmas.  i'm trying to stay positive.  and the later this baby comes the longer my leave will be in the spring.  i'm just thankful that i have a job that's been flexible with my final days, otherwise i would have wasted a whole lot of leave waiting around.  it's been nice to have somewhere to go, something to do, and something to take my mind off of the fact that this baby hasn't come yet.            

it's the little things ...

...  christmas decorations.

...  pancakes and coffee.

...  clean laundry.

...  watching the broncos win.  again.

...  night time walks.

...  christmas trees in windows.

...  bison chili. 

...  christmas cookies.

...  napping with henry.

...  christmas music.

...  charlie's birthday in less than a week.

...  wrapped presents.

...  3 day weekends.

  ...  home.

still no baby.

yes, that's right.  4 days past baby a's due date and s/he's still not here.

i realize 4 days is nothing in the big scheme of things but these past 4 days have seemed like a month.  

i was really hoping to be at home with a baby on maternity leave at this point but i'm sure come february i'll be glad for the few extra days.  

we've been ready for this baby for the past month, which has made the time go even slower.

all the clothes are washed, our bags are packed, the carseat's installed, christmas presents have been bought and wrapped, and the house is clean (for now).  

charlie has completely lost all patience, but obviously he's going to have to wait a bit longer.  

i don't feel like this kid is coming any time soon.  

in the meantime we've been distracting ourselves with nighttime walks.

i love wandering around the neighborhood now that everyone has their christmas lights up.

  

i've been baking lot of christmas cookies.

charlie ate 10 the first night.

he's also officially obsessed with words with friends.

i find this ironic for as many times as he's refused to play scrabble with me.

napping and cleaning have also proved to be excellent distractions.  

the dogs are pros at the napping.

i have a feeling henry's going to spend a lot of time awake once we bring this baby home so hopefully he'll be well rested.  i'm also hoping he calms down pretty quickly.  

it's the little things ...

...  relaxing weekends.

...  watching tebow win again.

...  potroast on a snowy sunday.

...  waking up to snow on a saturday morning and playing with the pups and charlie.

...  friday night movies.

...  watching it's a wonderful life.

...  free video chats.

...  working from home on a monday morning.

...  listening to christmas music while eating dinner.

...  chocolate chip cookies.

...  coming home to leftovers on a monday night.

...  baths.

...  clean sheets.

...  how extremely lazy henry is.

...  stockings hanging on the mantle.

...  when it's freezing out but my car's in the garage.

...  re-reading a really good book.

...  playing scrabble with charlie.

lately ...

...  there's been lots of snow.

... we've been listening to christmas music.

...  my snow boots have turned out to be the best investment ever.

...  i can no longer zip up any of my jackets which is no fun when temperatures are in the single digits.

...  long walks have been my favorite part of the weekend afternoons.

...  the dutch oven and crock pot have been involved in all meals.

...  charlie and i have been enjoying monday lunch dates.

...  henry has been staring out the window.

...  we've been waiting and waiting for this baby to come.

...  i'm getting more anxious to find out what this kid's middle name will be.

...  sweatpants and yoga pants have been the only thing i wear on the weekends.

...  toby has been sleeping under the covers at night.

...  i'm loving coming home to walked dogs and a christmas tree.

...  winter hats have once again made an appearance.

...  ollie has been sleeping under the christmas tree.